TEETHING

“They” always told me that, as soon as I had children, my own growth and learning would grind to a screeching halt, as all my energies would be voraciously consumed by my growing family.  Now 9 months into the adventure of parenting, I find the opposite to be the case.  It’s true, now that my amazing son is up on all fours and running (or at least crawling and climbing the furniture), time for book learning is not so readily available as it was and I have learned more from my child about what the world really is, and how G-d works in it, than from all the seforim in the world. 

Teething, for instance, is proving to be the most informative mirror of all the life transitions that have been on my plate: building my marriage, moving to Israel, becoming Torah-observant, and discovering what I am in the world for. All these things have happened like the emergence of my son’s sharp white teeth: paradoxically so suddenly that I can’t believe it, and so painstakingly slowly I can’t endure any more waiting.  The weeks seemed endless between my son’s first finger-gnawing excitement and the gradual first sighting of white ridges above the gum-line.  Then the two teeth slowly matured from ghostly sightings to undeniable fruition.  A long break followed, then more waiting, more night waking, more sightings, more miraculous materializations.

No words penned in the name of any tzaddik could teach me so effectively the meaning of sovlanut, of patience.  No holy book could have described so vividly the way HaShem, who’s great Name is the root and structure of all being, choreographs everything.  No matter how painful and soul-rattling the anticipation , especially the waiting process, for bringing something into being, be it my son’s first teeth, or my maturing family or my life’s work, whatever forms HaShem gives it,  nothing in life happens a moment sooner than I am ready, or a moment later than it’s perfect ripeness.

Miriam Schlackman

Iyar 5768